THINK PINK

Okay, I'm just going to get the saddest stuff out of the way first.

Above is a photo of girls I went to elementary school with. We've recently been in touch on Facebook, which has been a total delight. That's Renee Bourdess up there, third from the right. We were best friends in Kindergarten and 1st grade -- Mrs. Aasland called us the "Sunshine Twins," which I think has stayed with me as one of the best identity builders ever. Other girls in there include Renee Walrath, second from right, who was a cheerleader in 7th grade and loved MTV so much she could dance like anybody she wanted to emulate -- Michael Jackson, Cyndi Lauper, Boy George. And there's Janell Stussy, second from left, always the pretty tomboy, and Cheryl Anspach, third from the left, everybody's friend and someone who could always be counted on.

But someone is missing. Missing, missing, missing. And it's Shannon Boone. Shannon Boone, who was so theatrical and brilliant and passionate. Mrs. McNeil chose her to play Imogene Herdman in our 3rd grade Gifted Class's rendition of The Best Christmas Pageant Ever -- possibly because Shannon was scrappy and effusive and loud, but probably mostly because Shannon was smart enough to know how to play Imogene with edge and heart -- because Imogene Herdman had to be the character the audience could see as the most powerfully changed by the Christmas story, a hard knock kid playing mother to the baby Jesus.

I moved away from these girls in 7th grade, but I've often thought of Shannon -- and how she could drive me crazy with her loudness, her sensitivity, our mutual jealousies over our favorite friend Dawn Looker -- and I've wondered what became of her.

And I'm sorry to report that Shannon died of breast cancer. It makes me so sad to write that. Here's what Renee Bourdess told me in an email -- and it's absolutely heartbreaking:

***
Hi Anjie-
Yes, we did walk for Shannon. She died of breast cancer 5 years ago this January. It is horribly sad, I actually have goosebumps as I type it.

Where do I start.......Shannon was married and had just gotten pregnant with her first baby. She went in for her first OB appt. and they found a lump in her breast. Did a biopsy and turned out to be Stage 4 breast cancer. At that point, it had already spread. She chose to do chemotherapy and fought a valiant battle for 13 months until she passed. She did not end up having the baby. :( It's an awful, heart wrenching story.....she was only 34 years old. Ugh.

Her parents had a memorial service for her at Franklin Pierce and that's where I ran into all those gals you see in the photo. A lot of them I hadn't seen since high school or shortly after. So we decided to meet for dinner and we all showed up and have been doing "girls night" once a month ever since, or at least we try. That's how we came to be the Pinks.......

As sad as it was to lose Shannon, we all feel very blessed that out of her death came the reconnecting of all of us and the development of amazing friendships. It was such an honor to do the walk in memory of her. Her mom walked with us and she is one of the most amazing women I know. We have all become close to her and she is such an inspiration.

Whew, goodness, as you can tell this is very close to my heart!
***

So, those are the Pinks up there, including Shannon's brave mother (on the far right) and that's Shannon's story.

My pal Karen's family lost their Aunt Mary last year to breast cancer. This year the family Walked for Hope in honor of her:



Here are a couple friends who walked the Avon 3-Day in honor of survivors and living fighters.

My friend Amy Vattuone, third from the right and 4 months pregnant here, walked with a group of her girlfriends in Seattle -- calling themselves something like the Aereola Borealis Team:


And my dear friend from the dental school years, Shari Michaud, (at right, below) walked with her sister Julie in honor of Julie's current fight against breast cancer. I've posted about Shari's sister/endeavor before, if you'd like to read her story.

Here's Shari's report:

***
Last weekend Nov 13-15 was the Three day walk. After 60 miles we were tired and sore but hope was alive! It was an amazing experience and I feel so humble to have such wonderful friends and family that made it possible for my Sister Julie and I to participate...

It meant the world to us to be a part of something so personal and to have the chance to fight Breast Cancer as sisters! There was a moment at the closing ceremonies where they honored the survivors and my sister Julie was standing there so strong and so brave.

It was emotionally overwhelming. I never want to lose her and I believe in a cure! She is an incredible mom, sister, wife, and friend. I know Breast Cancer and Cancer have taken so many loved ones and caused so much pain. However, last weekend they were able to raise over 4.1 million dollars in the fight to cure cancer. I know with God a miracle can happen!
***
Think Pink.

My Boy

Aubrey came home from school early on Thursday with a headache and fever. She and Dane were scheduled to take their fifth of six pottery classes that day right after school. It was 3 o'clock and the pottery class had been going for 15 minutes when I realized Dane might be wondering where Aubrey was.

I called the office to get a message to him. The secretary said she'd get a message to Dane, but, for some reason, Dane didn't get the message. However, at 3:05 I got a phone call.

"Mama?"

"Hi honey..."

"Did Aubrey come home already?"

"Yeah, didn't you get the message in pottery?"

"No... I went around the school looking for her after I went to her classroom and saw that her things weren't on her hook."

"Aw... were you worried?"

"Yeah. But it's okay... Can I talk to her? I want to ask her some questions."

I hand the phone to Aubrey. I hear her say things like, "Yeah, I got a fever" and then "Blue... red... yeah, red... yeah, there's three things..."

Turns out that was the day they were going to get to paint their pottery items, and Dane wanted to make sure hers got painted.

Of course I'm biased, but what' s there not to LOVE about a boy like that! He's about the sweetest boy ever. He's always like that.

Man, I love that kid.

Dane with Aubrey and his Mema.

Aubarrhea

Dane, try saying diarrhea out loud... Doesn't it sound beautiful? -Aubrey, age 7

***

Monday's Rockin' Recipe Share

This one was originally published in The Oregonian, but I didn't see it there years ago -- so my best pal Karen took it upon herself to send it to me this weekend. I doubled it and gave half of it to Dane's buddy's family, who has a new baby in the house as of two days before Halloween. It was EASY and DELICIOUS, two things which, of course, go great together.

TACO SOUP

1 lb ground beef, chorizo or turkey
1 envelope taco seasoning mix
1 envelope ranch dressing mix (there's one with chipotle powder if you like spicy)
1 15-oz can kidney beans, drained
1 15-oz can pinto beans, drained
1 15-oz can garbanzo beans, drained
1 14.5 oz can diced tomatoes (any style, seasoned or not)
1-1/2 c frozen corn kernels
4 c water

Garnish with any or all of the following (I recommend ALL!):
crumbled tortilla chips
cubed avocado
shredded cheese
sour cream
cilantro

1) Brown the meat in a soup pot over medium heat, breaking up chunks with a spoon.
2) Drain the fat. Add the taco and ranch seasoning mixes, and stir to incorporate.
3) Add the beans, tomatoes, corn and water.
4) Bring to a boil and then heat and simmer for 5 minutes.

You're done!

Makes 6 servings.

A POST FOR THE CURIOUS

This is the living room BEFORE we bought the house

This is what it looks like NOW:

(note: the walls look washed out in my photos,

but they're a light sage green)

Dane's awesome new guitar is going to hang
next to that window (above)

You may recall we spent the summer in transition--
demolishing the kitchen, eating food in the back yard,
doing dishes in the bathtub, living with boxes covering the floor
to the ceiling in the living room... When we finally furnished
this space in September (after three long months)
it felt like a place where we could kick up our feet, read a good book,
and even do a cartwheel (just ask Aubrey).

Here's the view into the living room, which we never
would have had if we hadn't removed a chimney,
taken out a wall, and created a new bar and counter:

I wouldn't say it's quite done, but it sure feels like a great start.

Will post pictures of the new kitchen and the dining room

after I, um, clean it up a little.

HALLOWEEN FRIGHT '09

The festivities started out on Friday afternoon with costumes and a Ghost Walk at the kids' school. They begged me to come dressed up and in the spirit of things, so I pulled together this little number in a matter of minutes. It's amazing what you can do with a brown Crayola marker, pieces of wig hair, and a little Caro syrup.

It's also amazing how easy it is to gross your kids out and have them beg you to take off your costume and do something different.

So, the next day I changed my get-up, but Mick absconded with my idea and made it his own. Talk about gross.

That's right, ladies. I married for love.

But here are the real stars of the show:

Cleopatra

Cleopatra and the Grim Reaper (with Avery the Pirate)

Grim Reaper and Jack Sparrow pre-parade.

Cleo with Felicity, the Monarch Butterfly

with Indi the Geisha

and, of course, there was Elvis (Logan)

Funkity Ann (Kerry) with Val Pal

The Geisha Girls and a couple of Ninjas (cousins, Auntie, their Grammy)

Scary brothers.

and the stunning hodge-podge

of Halloween Fright.

it was so great to come home to these guys

D*A*N*E

A*U*B*R*E*Y

T*H*A*T M*I*C*K

The Kentucky Chronicles - Day 4

This'll have to be quick, since checkout's in an hour. Maybe I'll post part II tonight.

Spent Sunday night at the Combs Motel in Hazard. Combs is a huge name in Kentucky, and while I understand not all Combs are alike, let's just say Mr. Combs' comments about the Civil Rights Movement reminded me that not everyone thinks progress is progress. That's all I'll say.

Well, and that I ate at Applebee's twice on Sunday -- and not even different Applebee's, the same one. I don't know whether that says more about me, or Hazard.

Monday morning, I went to the Perry County Library in Hazard and photocopied $5 worth of information on the area and era I'm interested in. Then I hopped in my car and drove a few hours to Pineville, where I spent the night near Cumberland Gap at Pine Mountain State Park Resort.

The area is gorgeous and I drove and hiked through areas that made me want to breathe deeply.


I'm headed north toward Lexington today -- might go halfway or so. Tomorrow at 1 I have an interview with Linda (a former Combs!) in the genealogy section of the History Museum. I'm hoping she can round out her cousin's perspective a little.

At least her cousin had some awesome gourds on display.

You bet I coveted the horn. Plan on making one next year now. Save me a long piece if you've got one.

The Kentucky Chronicles - Day 3


People take cemeteries seriously here. Lots of cemeteries, lots of gravestones, and most of them with flags or bright flowers. They're especially stunning in the fall.

And look! There's where Daniel Boone's buried! Well, except for his head, which the nice man who buried him decided to set in plaster, and is now on display in the Kentucky History Museum.


Okay, it's more complicated than that. In fact, it's almost confusing. Daniel Boone was buried in an unmarked grave next to his wife Rebekah in 1820. Their graves were unmarked until the 1830's when they were exhumed and taken to Frankfort, the capitol of Kentucky.

However, the Boone family supposedly didn't really want them exhumed, so they quietly let the remains of another, mistaken unmarked slave grave be moved.

So, in 1983, when a forensic expert examined the crude plaster cast made at the time of Boone's reburial, he announced "Boy, this could really be the skull of a Negro."

Uh, yeah. Awkward comment.

So, the plaster cast of the skull buried there tells us it's not actually Daniel Boone buried there? Okay, folks. Show's over. Go about your business.

**

I would post more tonight, but I've spent an hour and a half uploading pictures from my camera. Show's over for this girl, too, for now. Will try to post again the a.m. if I'm not otherwise inspired.

The Kentucky Chronicles – Day 2

Spent the day in Frankfort, viewing exhibits at the Kentucky History Museum, watching a presentation on “Haints in the Holler,” and conversing with locals.

Conversing with locals was probably the most fruitful, as I learned about race relations, stories passed down by Grandma, clothes sewn from grain bags, and Berea College. I was really tempted to get this local couple’s contact info, but I got shy. I should’ve pursued it. They said they’d invite me to dinner at their house in Harrodsburg, but they were traveling through eastern Kentucky themselves for the week. Promise to self: get contact info of next helpful local I meet.

“Haints in the Holler” was a gooby little presentation that had interesting information about superstition in Appalachia. I videotaped it, with their permission, so I can catch some of the phrases and ideas and show it to Dane and Aubrey. Funnily enough, they sang “There was an old lady all skin and bones… oo-oo-oo-oo-oo… she lived down by the old graveyard… oo-oo-oo-oo-oo...” etc. Dane and Aubrey have been singing that for weeks! They learned it in school and have been circling the kitchen table singing it over and over.

My local couple mentioned the separate white and black mining camps without any prompting from me. They actually hadn’t heard about the camps until recently – because they lived in Ashland, KY, (a-ha!), which they say wasn’t a very diverse Appalachian town. When I asked if they thought racial tensions existed, they said they of course hadn’t seen them, but imagined there must have been, simply because they were kept separate.

When I finally left the museum around 3 PM, I headed southeast toward Natural Bridges State Park Resort. The park has hundreds of arches and bridges – sort of like what’s famous in Arches National Monument in Utah – and I’m going to hike and tram it tomorrow. Looking forward to that.



I’m not staying in the park, though. Here’s a little story I wrote about staying in Clay City instead.

**

A MAN IN KENTUCKY SURE IS LUCKY

The hotel owner stepped out the lobby in his brown bathrobe. Barefoot, he descended the steps, his knobby white toes curling over each ledge as he made his way down.

“Whatcha need, hon?” he asked, his dark hair ruffling a bit in the breeze. It’s no wonder I thought he looked like an aged Bo or Luke Duke. I am, after all, in the heart of fictional Hazzard County, Kentucky. And, even though I want my stereotypes and prejudices to go away, here they come up when I’m talking to a guy at work in his terrycloth bathrobe.

“Do you have any vacancies?” I ask, trying not to look at how well his robe is belted shut.

“Just got one,” he says, as he turns his body toward Room 9. The sky is sprinkling a little rain and he’s got customers there he’s settling in.

“Let me go up to National Bridge State Park and see if they’ve got anything,” I say. “That’s where I’m headed tomorrow.” It’s 4 o’clock, and I’m probably cutting it close, but it seems worth a try.

“Well, good luck,” he says, squinting. “Take my number and call for that room if you need it. It’s the busiest time of year here with the trees changing color and all – I’ve been full every night.”

That must be why he can afford to do business in his bathrobe.

I get his business card, drive 15 miles southeast, discover there’s one room at the lodge, but it’s a hundred dollars more than Robe Man’s hotel – and I just plan to read and write tonight anyway.

I call him fast as I can and reserve his last room.

“Okay, darlin’. You’ll be in Room 1,” he says. “I’ll leave your key there with the credit card slip for us to settle up in the morning. I’m heading out now for dinner and drinks and dancing – and I have no idea when I’ll be back…”

I smile to myself as I turn off my cell, partly because I’m staying at the last cheap room near the park— but mostly because even though I haven’t seen a restaurant or bar for miles and miles out here (for all I know it’s a “dry” county), I know of a hotel owner who’ll be out cutting a rug somewhere.

And even though I can’t imagine where that would be, of course I picture his hair flapping side to side as his knobby white feet shuffle him around some dimly lit dance floor – in his robe.



**

Took a nap at 6 PM, ate a grilled turkey sandwich and Heath Bar Crunch Blizzard at DQ, and read and wrote in my room until 11:37 local time.

Wrote a couple character background worksheets for my book, 3 postcards for my kids, including one horse haiku, and the above journal entry.

Read the opening essays in Confronting Appalachian Stereotypes: Back Talk from an American Region. This book’s a little scary. Stereotypical characters can create excellent tension and drama in a narrative. Don’t want to think too hard about what I’m doing – don’t want to be ignorant and cruel though.

I bought that book at the museum; also bought Bloodroot: Reflections on Place By Appalachian Women Writers. I read that while at Soapstone (it was a library book) and I loved it. It’s perfect to own it – it gives an intense sense of the daily lives of people living in the region and era I’m writing about.

Still haven’t turned on the TV, even though it’s been tempting. Am committed to letting creativity come to me in the silence of my room. Wasn’t even able to connect to the internet today – wonder what I’m missing!

Resting up for tomorrow now. Need to be on the tram up to see a natural arch at 10 AM and then drive to Hazard for some upclose research. Hope to meet a helpful librarian tomorrow or Monday who can tell me what sort of school options mountain folk had in the 50s and 60s, what race relations were like (especially the mining camps), how many houses could exist in a holler (and how close they were to each other), and how long folks could go way up in those isolated places without contact with anyone from town…

The Kentucky Chronicles - Day 1


Dear Dane and Aubrey,

I arrived in Lexington today at 6 PM (that's 3 PM time in Ashland) and I was amazed to see the greenest, lushest vast expanse of fields ever. Lexington is known for its horse racing and training -- and you wouldn't believe how many fields and horses and stables and race tracks there are around here!

Even at the airport, the place is filled with giant photos of horses and fields, and when you walk out to your car there are bronze statues of famous fast horses and their jockeys. The Kentucky Derby is THE biggest horse race around - and people here are proud of it. Even the street that takes you out of the airport is named Man o War, named after one of the most famous race horses in history. Someday we should look that up together.


When I left the airport, I drove to the state's capitol, Frankfort, where tomorrow I'll research Appalachian life. Appalachian mountain life has very little to do with this Lexington horse life, so it'll be a real change of pace. To learn what I need to learn in Frankfort, I'll be at the Thomas D. Clark Center for Kentucky History, using the Martin F. Schmidt Research Library, photocopying pictures and information about hollers and gaps and mountain homes and schools and transportation for mountain people in the 1950s and 60s. I'm also going to try to learn about race relations -- between whites and blacks -- in that region and era.

This is probably enough info for now. You're probably interested in my hotel room, though, so I'll tell you it looks like most of the others we've ever stayed in, but GUESS WHAT? I'm not going to turn on my TV! I'm going to write and read and research my brains out.

Love and miss you both so much. Give Daddy a hug and kiss for me - and tell Mema thanks for spending last week with us, and to drive home safely tomorrow.

Love, Mom

P.S. Tomorrow I plan to take more pictures to post on the blog for you to see...

A LITTLE CATCH-UP BLOG SESH

It seems to be getting more and more challenging to sit down and post a blog these days. Perhaps it's because we bought the house, moved in, remodeled the kitchen (well, that should be present tense), and then tried to live life as normal in between. Seems that the blog gets the shaft, though. And that just aint right!

So, this little entry is just an attempt to pick up business as usual again with the blog and write down the stuff that's simply going to be a record of our lives when Dane and Aubrey look through it in the years to come.

*Dane, Aubrey and I got our H1N1 nasal sniffs yesterday. Aubrey seems to get everything that comes through town, in general, and the Flu took out the two of us for nearly a month last year. It was painful, miserable -- see this post -- so I decided to try a vaccine for a regular strand of Flu virus and N1H1. Dane hasn't ever been hit too hard, but I decided to go for the three of us. Mick has to handle his separately, due to his work schedule and his diabetes.

*Both kids are in soccer right now, wrapping up a 6 week season with the Y. Playing for last year's coaches, Toph (Dane) and Scott (Aubs). Dane's particularly liking Defense - because "you stay back and just boot the ball down the field" and Aubrey still likes most every position. She seems to have come to a greater understanding this week of the joy of a passing game.

*I'm flying to Lexington, KY, tomorrow morning to research what life was like in the hills and hollers of Eastern Kentucky back in the late 50s, early 60s. I'm still working on the first draft of my novel. I've gotten some early encouragement from an editor - and it's the work that got me into my residency at Soapstone - but I've been a little paralyzed with all the transitions of the last couple years, as well as the fact that I hadn't been to my setting. Time to give that up, though, and get my arse there. I have plans to research at the Genealogical and Historical Societies in Frankfort (and interview two people there), stay in Hazard, lodge in Pine Mountain State Park, and listen to a talk on "Haints in the Holler." Other than that, I mostly plan to listen to the dialect, eat the food in diners, and look up, look down, and breathe a lot of everything.

*We've had house guests for nearly two weeks: Jan and Mike were here for about 5 days (following 4 days of Strep throat for Aubrey), and my Mom came for a week the night Mike and Jan left. This was all for Dane's birthday, lucky boy.

*My mom's been helping me figure out my crazy yard, with its dying English Laurels, overgrown bushes, and abundant yard waste. With the help of a consultant, we've now got a plan. It might not go into effect immediately -- in fact, I haven't even had time to tell Mick what the consultant said! -- but it gives us a greater overall vision for this sweet little plot of land.

*Dane and Aubrey still have plenty of places to dig in this yard. Overheard conversation yesterday: Dane with much enthusiasm, met with equal enthusiasm, "Let's pretend we're professional diggers and this is our first job in Ashland!" It looks like they're making a ditch.

*We still ride or bike to school every day. This is a fabulously convenient location.

*The kids are taking after-school classes for 6 weeks. Dane's taking Tennis and Pottery, hour-long classes per week. Aubrey's taking Beading and Pottery, also an hour each per week -- and, because I'm helping out with the Sewing class, Aubrey's sitting in on that, too. She made a terrific little stuffed pumpkin yesterday. Dane would sew, too, but Tennis is at the same time.

*Dane started half-hour Guitar lessons at the Y twice a week. He's learned E chord, A and D, I think.

*The kitchen's nearly done -- just in need of trim (when will THAT happen???) and cabinetry set up in the adjacent laundry room. It is so spectacularly fabulous to have it nearly completed, and it's BEAUTIFUL. My living room is equally beautiful now, and FURNISHED! We had it ceiling high in boxes for June, July and August, but I finally bought furniture for it, and it's a cozy little haven now. I know it's REALLY MEAN to say all that and not post pictures. But I don't have any yet. I'll have to get right on that. Um, after Kentucky...

Okay, I'm feeling like a better blogger now. It may not have all been interesting, but at least it's DONE for another day.

Today might be Dane's birthday and all (see post below),

but let's not forget how awesome Dave Lane is, folks.

This is the sort of picture Mick and Dave
email back and forth all day.

oh, yeah!

bowling with buddies

pre-partying with grammy and grand-dad

wooping it up with the 'rents and pink-headed sister

bubble gum ice cream - the reynolds ice cream of choice, natch.

ready to rock - thanks to parents and both sets of grandparents

werewolf cupcakes, man.

the birthday boy.

happy 9th birthday, rocco. we love that you insist long hair is 'you,' that everybody who meets you wants to be your friend, that you play your heart out at any sport you play, and that you give really, really good hugs.

TWELVE GREAT YEARS
Happy Anniversary, Hot Stuff